There has been much to think about these last few weeks.
I started a new job which I thought would be interesting. The ladies who already worked there seemed nice. It is a business I knew nothing about until now. It is a company I had never heard before now. It seemed to be something I would like.
But I find am not liking the work, or the business as much as I thought I might. While this is not earth shattering new on any count (most of us have found out we didn’t like a new job), it has made me really think bout my life, what I want out of, and what I want to do with it.
It is not this.
Perhaps I am simply getting too old to let things slide, or put up with snarky remarks, hostile reprimands and thinly veiled anger. So much of this particular persons actions remind very much or passive aggressive behavior I found so disgusting in my ex-husband and his family.
I do understand that employees has no rights. We have no protection from the law. We are required to work as our employers demand. Overtime, time off and even sick leave is all controlled by the employer.
My current employer demands unannounced overtime. If they think I need to stay at the end of my day, I have to stay. Even if my work is done, I have to stay when ‘asked’. To be clear, I don’t mind working overtime if I am asked ahead of time (could you stay late tomorrow? – sure, not a problem). I will come in early if asked (sometimes even if I’m not asked and I am allowed, I will come in early). I find I DO mind being told at the end of my work shift that I need to stay late. And being told in nasty ,snarky manner doesn’t help the situation at all. I can not make plans if I do not know my work schedule., or I have to cancel plans already made. I dislike decisions about my life being taken away from me.
I find I am not happy with my life, so this unhappiness impacts how I feel across the board. Some days it feel like a one feeds off the other. Ugh. Not good.
I want to make changes in my life. I want to do a different kind of work. Long ago, and far away, I worked taking care of the ASPCA impounded horses at my college. I have volunteered my grooming skills at shelter to make animals more adoptable. I have worked with abused animals on a very small scale. From time to time I help with a breed rescue. While I can’t do much, I do what I can. All of these things made me feel like I was doing some good. Maybe it is was a small good, but was good.
I want to work for an animal welfare program, rescue or non-profit.
I know it isn’t easy work. I know it is hard work. But it is work I will enjoy at the end of the day.