My life, at the moment, is full of uncertainties. I very recently received a text (yes a TEXT) from my place of employment telling my that due to staff changes I now had a different day off. And enjoy my three-day weekend. When I replied with a query I received no answer. So I spent the next three days wondering what happened, or what was going to happen. It was not a relaxing three days.
I was informed on my next scheduled working day that my hours have been cut back. This puts my already precarious new life in the toaster. I can not afford a place to live, food or keep my car with fewer hours. It does not matter that the hours the big ‘them’ look at are attached to real humans with bills and responsibilities. We, the employees, are simply tools to used and cast aside when it suits them. And no, this business is not in any jeopardy. In fact, they are making more money than they have in the past.
My emotional distress at the news was pretty much ignored. I did say I would have liked to have known three days earlier to have time to internalize the news, rather having to try to deal with it at work. I found it almost cruel to have to have had to try to do my job (which is a front and center type of job) while trying work through this huge emotional and financial blow.
To add insult to injury, I was asked to something I simply could not do under the circumstances. My emotional state was not in a place where I could what was asked in safe manner. I declined to do what was asked. Instead of asking me why, I was suspended for insubordination. Thanks guys. It’s always nice to get punched in the gut twice. To be honest, I was happy to escape the day and have my break down in the privacy of my now temporary home.
Now I wait to the called in to have a meeting with my supervisors. I know darn well they will wait until the day is almost over to do so. It’s all a part of ‘teaching me a lesson’, I suppose. The longer I wait more I will be willing to agree to anything they may ask of me. I have written my letter of apology and sent it off, so I have nothing new to say to them.
I know a few more things. I know I will not work in this particular industry ever again. I know I will work harder to move forward into my own business interest. I know I am stronger for standing up for myself. The job be damned, I was not in a place to what was asked in safe manner.
While others may think I am being left to twist in wind once again, I am not letting it be that. I am working on my next move. There are better things in life for me
All I have to do is survive this blip on my radar.