I saw you the other day, stopped on the long freeway on ramp. It was hot out. Very hot. You were stopped there to remove your leathers and cool down.
I get that, I really do. I used ride my own motorcycle. I was thankful for the ballistic mesh jacket and over pants I had. They kept me cool and safe. I was never worried about leaving my skin on the macadam should I be in an accident. But you had the old-fashioned leathers. They are very hot and get a wee bit sticky and uncomfortable on a hot summer’s day. While I question the removal of safety gear, I get the part about being too hot.
But as I glided by in my air-conditioned car, I noticed something the made the whole scene disturbing. You had stripped off your leather jacket and riding chaps. You had removed your shirt and now had on only a pair of shorts and boots. Unfortunately, you did NOT look like this:
Not in any way, shape or form did look like that. Had you indeed looked like the above piece of yummy man candy, all of the women (and a few men) would have gladly accepted the fact your were too hot in your leathers, and well, those horrible sweaty things just had to go. Yes please, pack those hot things away in your saddlebags and continue your ride.
But you had a different shape entirely. You had more of a roundish shape. And yes, round is a shape, but most of us prefer not to see your roundness in its complete, uncovered glory. Not even a little bit. Leaving your shirt on would have made it less disturbing. But no, you wanted share with the world your love for donuts, cheeseburgers, fries, pie, cookies, beer and more beer. And, well, beer.
And our story does not end here. Oh no, there the one last, even more disturbing, element to this story.
You finished stripping away everything that made you hot (not hot, but plain old hot). You packed it all away in your saddlebags and now had motored your way onto the freeway. I had thought it couldn’t get any worse. Really, I did. I thought the ‘show’ was over. I would recover and go on my merry way unmolested. I was wrong. Very much wrong. So, so wrong.
As I drove my merry way along the freeway, I heard a motorcycle. I looked into my rearview mirror. And there you were. Catching up, getting ready to overtake us slower moving vehicles. I was stunned. I could not look away. I could no longer hear the radio or the other cars. Because with your shirt and jacket off. With only shorts and boots on. You looked like you were naked on your motorbike.
And some things just can not be unseen. Ever.