The Boomerang Effect

Published October 17, 2013 by mindfulofchatter


After weeks of not hearing a single word, I received an e-mail message from Mr. Square Dance.  I have to admit, I sat and stared at it stupidly for a bit. No, really. I couldn’t fathom why someone who obviously does have enough interest to bother to write, text or ring would suddenly think I’d want to go out again. I was flabbergasted. Speechless even! My brain just couldn’t make sense of it.

From the time Mr. SD accepted the job as an over-the-road trucker, he has not been in touch. I may as well have dropped into a chasm or been eaten by a Balrog (or whatever it is Balrogs do when they catch us puny humans). I took the hint. He is not as interested as he had seemed. He has no place in his life for a significant other. Okay. Move forward. No a big deal in my book. Disappointed, yes. Devastated, no. I figured he showed his true colors. That other shoe I waiting to hear drop, fell with a loud THUD!

And yet, there sat an e-mail from him in my inbox. Waiting patiently to be read and possibly responded to. It crossed my mind to just delete it with no further ado. But I am a curious thing. Deathly curiosity be damned! I opened it.

How about dinner and a dance on Saturday?

Had I been drinking something, there would have been a spit take and nose blow. No word for weeks. Yes, literally weeks. And now, all of a sudden, an invitation out. No apology for not keeping in touch. No explanation. Just an out of the blue invitation to go out. Are you freakin’ kidding me?

I mulled this over for a few minutes. Not accepting it, mind you, but answering it. I had a few options here. I could accept and have a night out dining and dancing. I could tell him where to stick his dinner, then try to dance all on his own. I tell him to simply piss off. I could completely ignore the entire e-mail and hit ‘delete’. Hmmmmmmm…………….let me think.

I took the ‘high road’. I told him the truth. I already had plans with a group that day, and would be in the next town over all day. I didn’t know when the group thing would end, because we had made loose plans with no real finish. In short, I was politely telling him no.

He replied;

But the dance in is that town. You could just meet me somewhere after your group thing is done.

Seriously? Had I wanted to see him again, I would have gone to the group get together and left early enough to come home and get ready to go out. Why could he NOT see that? Did he think I was so hard up for a date that he could just reappear in my life whenever and I’d jump up and down and spit nickels? Or is he simply that dense.


We’re going as a group. I have no control over when I will be able to leave. There was talk of lunch and perhaps dinner. I don’t see how I can haul my dance stuff along (he wanted to go square dancing) and find a place to change.


You can change at the hall. Lots of the girls do that because they are coming from work.

Okay, now I am getting peeved. I have tried to be nice. I have stated I AM BUSY.  I have said I WILL NOT BE HOME (as in BUSY). And he is still trying to figure out a way to make this date a go. Maybe I should have stuck to the tried and true ‘I have to wash my hair.’ or ‘I’m sorry. I broke both legs, an arm and finger so I can’t dance.’ But knowing him, he’d tell he could help me wash my hair, or he’d man the wheelchair at the dance. Either way, I’d be on a date I didn’t want to be on. Rats.

Believe it or not, I do not enjoy being mean. Snarky, yes. Plain old mean, no. So I gathered my magic robe of snarky and sarcastic responses around me and prepared to answer him one last time. As a response began to form, another e-mail appeared:

I’m being sent to Montana, so you are off the hook.

Off the hook? What hook? I have been telling you all along I AM BUSY!  Had I changed my plans and had gone out with him, I would have been left holding the empty leftovers bag.

It has been 2 1/2 weeks since that exchange. Guess how many times I have heard from him? No, go on. Guess. Did you all guess zero? ding! ding! ding! ding! You all win a prize! (Restrictions may vary. Title ,tax and licensing fees may apply. See entry form for details). Not one word since. No text, not calls no e-mail. He has been deleted from my databases (actually, I deleted him weeks ago, but this sounded so good I had to add it in). He done. Gone. History.

Me? I went to the group get together. Only three people showed up. We had a very good time. One gal left early in the day, leaving me and the one man together. We spent the rest of the day together having a blast.

But that is another story.


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