It’s Supposed To Be Dating. So Why Are There Tumbleweeds?

Published April 26, 2013 by mindfulofchatter

weed on a bench

As I continue with this desert I call my dating life, I have come to realize a few things. Okay, maybe it’s just one thing. No, it’s a few things. I’m pretty sure of that. Just a few (hundred) things.

The biggest thing being; I’m not liking the men my age.

It’s not their looks, for the most part. I honestly don’t mind a few wobbly bits. I mean, I have them, so why would I complain about them on someone else? It’s the attitude. Or perhaps the lack of a fun attitude. They all seem so old mannish. Stuffy old man clothes and those big, plastic aviator style glasses. No or little techie knowledge. No that I am a super techie or anything, but I know how to text and take a picture with my phone and share it. I can get around on my computer. I don’t want to spend hours teaching my date how to navigate on his phone. It’s often like talking to my Grandpa. Which is really bad, because Grandpa has been dead for decades.

And, with my generation, it seems I have two choices. The ultra conservative, or the hippie (or wanna be hippie). I’m not particularly wild about either one. As with most things, there needs to be a balance. I tend to lean towards the spiritual side, but I haven’t fallen over into the weird ‘I have to sleep under a pyramid to restore my energy’ territory. Nor am I into organized religions. I am not against anyone making those choices for themselves, but leave me out it, thank you very much.

The men I have met have been nice enough (Okay, yeah. Some were just creepy. But anyway). But the spark for life seems to have died somewhere along the way. One guy has had motorcycles all his life (He even this to me so I wouldn’t be thinking he was having a mid-life crises). He still has them and rides all the time. And I mean – All. The. Time. He has no time to date, because he on the bike. And they are all single ups (one person bikes). Yet he hasn’t figured out why he isn’t finding someone. Hmmm. One guy was all excited about us going to some huge pot party in the hills. I am not 420 friendly, and told him so. He didn’t care ‘Cuz it will be sooooo f’ing cool, you’ll get high along with everyone else!’. No, I won’t. And no, I won’t share your pyramid either.

And the hair. OhMyGod. From the lack of hair to ones who still don’t know what a barber is. I have seen them all. I don’t mind bald (Think Yul Brenner). I don’t mind well-kept long hair. I DO mind comb overs, nasty frizzy ponytails, unwashed, greasy messes and the guy who apparently still doesn’t know what a brush and comb are for. And white folks should never have Rasta braids. Ever. (Except for the one white guy I saw who not only did them properly, but pulled it off). This goes for beards as well. If you are going to have a beard, keep it up properly. I really can’t stand the biker look beard and pony tail show. Just ew. Wash them both. Have them trimmed and shaped. After a certain age guys, you can’t pull it off. So stop trying. No, really. Just stop.

The men a few years younger than I am, seem to be more of what I’d like. They are more tech oriented. They still care about dressing a little closer to this century. They still care about their hair enough to keep it looking nice. But most will not date someone older than they are. Being in their 40’s, they are still looking for the younger women. The ones I have met, or talked to, have been the creepers. We all remember Mr. Tell Me About Your Underwear.

So it seems I will be watching the tumbleweeds tumble for a while longer. I have update my dating profile, added a new photo or two and made myself a few new rules. So far I have been ‘hit up’ by a 66-year-old and 68-year-old. They are not going to go anywhere but into the delete bin. The 68-year-old was still trying to rock the biker beard and pony tail show. It made my eyes hurt.

Maybe I’ll just get another dog.

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