All of a sudden, my dating profile as sort of taken off. I say sort of, because while I have had some new ‘action’, not a lot has come of it. And to be honest, I don’t expect it to.
I posted a new photo of myself. It far and away better than any of the old ones. Before I went to France, I bought a little digital camera for the trip. It has, as most cameras do, a self timer. So I focused on my chair, set the timer, plopped down. After a few tries, I got it mostly right. I don’t think anyone will miss seeing top of my hair. I mean, you can see I have my whole head and a not a Frankenstein flat top. Anyway, the photo came out very nice. So I posted it on my dating (I say that as if I actually have dates) profile. Ta-da! A dating profile complete with a very current ,in focus photo. What more could you ask for. Well, besides a date or two.
Out of boredom and waiting for the washer to run its cycle, I decided to look at profiles. I don’t why I do this. It tends to be an exercise in disappointment. But, being the glutton for punishment that I am, I plunged into the depths of profile searching.
Whilst searching, I got a message. *ping* It was from someone I had not had contact with before. So I answered, and soon we off on a message conversation. He finally invited me to instant chat. We did that for a bit, then he wanted to call me on the telephone. Being ever so ‘what the hell’, I said okie dokie. (for those you who are gasping and thinking stalker/creepy dude/whatever. It’s okay. I listen to, and trust my ‘red flag instincts’. There were none here).
This man had a very nice voice. He sounded intelligent, and was funny. He was also insecure (not he would admit it – ever) and pushed the limits of proper conservation. I have talked to men like this before. I find them amusing. I see the holes in their stories. I hear what they are not saying. I let them talk themselves further into their cute little holes. Some people really need to learn when to drop the shovel. He tried very hard to run the conversation. He blocked his number from me. He tried to ‘jokingly’ insult me to get me answer off-color questions. I haven’t had such a good laugh in a very long time.
Him: You haven’t made any comments on my voice. I know I have sensual voice. Why haven’t you said anything about it?
Me (outside voice): Yes, you do have a very nice voice. I was just thinking that.
Me (inside voice): Seriously? You need me to compliment you 10 minutes into this conversation?
Him (after we been talking about double standards): Well, when women jump from bed to bed, it’s because they have low self-esteem. That makes them slutty. Men don’t do that. Men just like sex.
Me: So what if a woman just likes sex and sleeps around for the same reason? How is she is a slut and he is not a slut?
Him: Women don’t do that. If they are self-confident, they are in monogamous relationships.
Me: But she’s not a slut if she gives it up on the first date?
(inside voice) *LMAO* Wow. Live in the dark ages much?
Him: No. If the chemistry is right, why not? I hate the rules of kiss on a the first date, maybe sex on the third. It’s stupid.
Him: (as I am signing off): I think we need to meet. I want you to come here on Thursday and walk in the park with me. I’ll let you know what time.
Me: Maybe. I have a few appointments this week.
(inside voice) And I’m thinking no way in hell am I walking in a secluded park you, bucko.
While all the is was going on, I got another message from new ‘suitor’. This was exciting! Three whole messages on my dating site in the same day! I was getting downright light-headed with giddiness. Well, until I read the darn thing.
Talk to me, doll.
What? ‘Doll’? Did he call me ‘doll’? I read it twice to be sure. Yep, he called me ‘doll’. I am a lot of things, some of them odd. But a doll? Um………no. The only men who get to call me ‘doll’ are WWII veterans. But I read the man’s profile to see if we could get past the ‘doll’ comment.
He claimed to be born in another country, but raised in yet another country. And he flat-out stated he was an alpha male ,but a gentleman. He even had a reference from someone he had dated on his profile. She said he was, indeed, an alpha male and not for the faint of heart. A gentleman, Intelligent and funny. I’m still not sure about having dating references on your profile, but whatever.
I am not faint hearted. I have no fear of an alpha males. Mostly I tend to confuse alpha males. Okay, okay. I tend confuse most males. But alpha males always kind blink at me like they have no idea what to do with me. My female friends tell me I am an alpha female, and this is a confusing situation for an alpha male who never met an alpha female before.
So I answered his message: Chit chat, or real conversation? Both are available. 🙂
So far, no response.
Alpha male, my sweet pa-tootie.